Saturday, December 8, 2012

SufferFestukah 2012: The Schedule of Suffering

SUFFERFESTUKAH - The Most Sufferful Time of the Year!

Home Sweet Home - Sufferlandria
Welcome to the 2d annual Festival of Suffering. Last year we hit upon the idea of doing all eight of's cycling workouts on consecutive days. Thanks to our dear Dictator of the Federation, Sufferlandrians have two new workouts for 2012. As such, SufferFestukah has been similarly extended. In addition to the new workouts, we'll be adding the two supplemental sessions (i.e., "Extra Shot" and "The Long Scream").

This year the suffering begins on 12/21/12 (or for our non-American readers: 21 December). Some of you may be thinking, Is this not the end of the world according to the Mayan Apocalypse? To that we say, It will only feel that way. And the Dictator laughs at you. muhahaHAHAHAha

As you look at the Schedule of Suffering, always keep the "three rules of triathlon"* ever present in your mind:

                  1. Do not get sick;
                  2. Do not get injured; and
                  3. Do not break rules #1 or #2.
*We cannot remember who the wise author of these rules is.

Be sure to scale the workouts accordingly so that you do not break any of the rules. What we learned last year is that day-in, day-out of Sufferfest workouts will accumulate enough fatigue to give you a mini-camp in your home, even if not done as prescribed. That said, you may want to identify some videos as key workouts that you will hit at 100%. Enough prattle!

The Schedule of Suffering

21st -   Downward Spiral (speed = 60:00)
22nd -  Angels (climbing = 62:00)
23rd -   Local Hero + Extra Shot:20 (TT & race + race = 1:45)
24th -   The Wretched (race = 48:00)
25th -   Revolver (speed = 45:00)
26th -   The Hunted (climbing = 60:00)
27th -   A Very Dark Place (speed = 55:00)
28th -   Fight Club (race & TT = 58:00)
29th -   There Is No Try (speed - 55:00)
30th -    Hell Hath No Fury + The Long Scream (race + TT = 1:45)

We hope all of you will join us for part or of all of this, the most suffering sufferdays of the year.

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